How often are you going about your day when an annoying freshman starts screaming “six-seven” in class? How often have you been denied your right to shame them? Well, a new addition to the Grace Hopper Center plans to solve this problem. 

Students and staff are all excited for the opening of the Grace Hopper Center, which is planned to finish construction in 2026. But, one of the most anticipated additions to ACC is the Shaming Hole. The Grace Hopper Center will be among the first schools to implement this revolutionary rehabilitation program. This article offers students and staff a guide on the ins and outs of this brand-new installation. 

The shaming hole is an all accessible, six-foot-wide (who knows how deep) hole. The hole provides students with an unforgettable experience that will serve to rehabilitate disruptive students in this new environment. After serving their punishment, students emerge from the hole as improved, brand-new, students ready to properly engage in the school environment. This hole will allow students to gain a new perspective on their right to sunlight. Many positives have been observed in students who undergo this process, such as less noise due to many students going through long (possibly permanent) periods of silence after serving time in the hole.

The shaming hole is an opportunity for disruptive students to take a break from the world. Students can report each other  for misbehavior at “shaming report stations” that will be replacing all fire alarm systems. The “shaming report system”  operates like a Rube Goldberg machine, an intricate system of dominos and pulleys will place down a mouse trap-like cage over the student in need of shaming.  If you see someone acting inappropriately, don’t hesitate to send them to the hole. All students are asked to avoid misusing the shaming report systems and to only use them when needed.

Afterwards, the shamed will be carried in their cage into the hole; this transportation is referred to as “The Hole Shaming Ceremony.” The ceremony consists of marching, drumming, candles, and even ceremonial hats.

The ceremony ends with the lowering of the shamed. When the punished individual is dropped into the hole, all shamed students have the right to a spork from the cafeteria being dropped in with them. This way, the student has a way to exit the hole via digging themselves free. During this time, students are allowed to give speeches or hymns of any kind with any content when the lowering of the punished is in place.

Here are works of art created by students inspired by their experience in the hole: “Searching For Sun”, “Alone”, “Eternal Night”, “HELP”, “A Carved Pocket of Hell”, “Inescapable Darkness”, “Trapped in the Center of the Earth”, and “I am more dirt than man.”

Art credits are absent by request from the artists; one student commented, “The hole has taught us that we have outgrown the use of our names. We are no longer people, just pieces of ground that resurfaced.”

This article also hopes to dispel concerns and misinformation regarding the shaming hole. One such concern is that students become hesitant to express themselves in fear of being shamed. ACC is well aware that the implementation of the hole could result in unnecessary shaming and misuse of the hole. To prevent this, trials will be done before all hole ceremonies. These trials will consist of witch trial-type dunkings. Students who survive the trial will face time in the hole. While students who are proven innocent through death will be allowed to resume their school day as usual.

Other concerns, such as students unable to emerge from the hole, due to spork breakage, or a simple inability to do so, will be granted a rope ladder if the student body has democratically elected for their freedom.

Another concern is that processes such as the hole ceremony may interrupt class time and get in the way of the hole ceremony participants’ education. This is a possibility the shaming hole community has thought long and hard about. Although this is a valid concern, the school has decided that some things are more important than an education. Sacrifices must be made to better the world. 

Some students have also expressed clarification regarding the hole ceremony ritual and etiquette. The hole ceremony takes place immediately after the caging of the shamed. All participation is optional, but those who choose to participate must adhere to certain rules and etiquette. 

Hole Ceremony Rule and Etiquette:

-We ask all students to be respectful during the hole ceremony, all violators will be sent to the hole as well.

-Remember the hole needs daily sacrifices and if ever there is a day that no one is in need of shaming, someone must be willing to heroically sacrifice themselves in order to keep the hole appeased.

-If you are participating in the hole-shaming ceremony, you must wear your ceremonial hat and follow all instructions given to you

-Don’t try to participate in hole ceremonies if you don’t routinely practice your marching/drumming/backflip skills. 

-Don’t be afraid to shame those going into the hole. It is kinder to spit on someone going into the hole than to smile at them, give them the necessary punishment they need to get better.

-Do things on beat and keep in rhythm

-Don’t stick your fingers in the shaming cage; the punished are known to bite.

-If you see any rats in the hole, please take them to the animal care classroom.

-Please be respectful towards the custodians and clean up any trash left in or around the hole.

-Make sure to have fun!

The hole will hopefully become a beloved piece of the school community and help ACC better demonstrate the values of the school. For any further questions or comments, please contact the school administrators. Thank you to all the students and staff who have made the shaming hole possible.